Yoo hoo…Wake up! It’s already January 22, 2012.  The first month of the new year has almost flown away, soon to become either a shadowy memory, hopefully pleasant, or a possible cause for your heaping on a big serving of self-recrimination..

How many of you are starting to feel like the air has leaked out of your balloon and that the  high ideals and goals that had you so pumped up on Dec 31 or Jan 1  have already fizzled?  How many of you are disappointed, or even worse, are beating yourselves up because you believe you have failed again.

You are not alone at all. We often get so carried away setting our lofty goals that we forget to spend time thinking about how to create a workable plan that is easy to stick with, and is one that includes rewards for even small achievements and gains. We spend a lot of time watching other people and perceiving that they are better, more efficient, more dedicated and more successful than we are. We focus on what we see as their results and wins, but we forgot to identify with them as human beings, as vulnerable and imperfect as ourselves. We don’t pay attention to the stumbles, setbacks and even the absolute disasters they experience before they get up and gingerly take a few more small steps and try anew. Instead, when we fall on our faces, we  feel sorry for ourselves, get frightened and discouraged, blame ourselves more than anyone else could ever do, and decide that our goals were unattainable and unrealistic and we should just give up. I am, not saying every one of us behaves this way, but a good percentage of people do.

I am writing this because I haven’t done so fabulously either with some of the  goals I set around the start of this month. Life, work, illness, the problems of family members, the crises of friends, needs of clients, have all piled up to form a mountain on which I have at times found it hard to get a foothold, let alone to climb to the top and plant a flag.   As we know, the shoemaker’s children go barefoot and the coach must be reminded to “coach thyself!”.  One of my New Year goals was to increase the frequency of my blog posts, but the days have been filled with other tasks and I haven’t done this yet.  As you well know, the longer that we procrastinate and do nothing, the more formidable the unclimbed mountain becomes.

. I have, admittedly, gotten a little stuck with the blog posts. I am not talking about writer’s block.  I constantly have new ideas that I write down and plop into  my idea catcher box, but I haven’t done much with them lately.  I have excused it by reminding myself how busy I am and how many other things I have to do.  Still, I  have spent time reading other blogs of those I admire, learn from and enjoy and inadvertently scolded myself for not getting back on the horse and knocking off more posts and articles.   That’s what I am doing today.   I am, back on the horse. I wrote a paragraph earlier, came back to the computer, wrote another, and here I am. I told myself that even if I only got to do a paragraph today, it would be ok.

What are some of your goals and can you find a way to break them into smaller, more doable tasks?  It’s crucial to stop comparing ourselves to others. It only makes our mountains harder to climb and makes us feel bad about ourselves and accomplish less.

Can’t get to those 10,000 steps a day?  What can you do at first, that is more realistic for you?  How about making an extra trip up and down the steps when you carry something to your bedroom? Leave your package in the bedroom as you intended, go downstairs, walk up and down one extra time,  It will only take a minute or two more, but it will start you in the right direction and get you working on your goal. You will begin to build your endurance and start to feel less breathless, less stiff. Once you are up and moving, it is somehow easier to keep on doing it.

One thing that seems to be common among people who run small businesses, is a difficulty in narrowing down our strongest skills and expertise, or the ways in which our businesses give people what they want or need. Without a clear picture of this, it is almost impossible to  get out there and market well..  So many of us, including me, just keep putting off the task of zeroing in on this important awareness and information. It seems like a big job and we have no idea where to start looking or how to begin.  We  do the same familiar, but not terribly effective things, over and over.  I can think of five colleagues who have listed this as a project to take on starting Jan 1st, but who haven’t gotten anywhere with it.  Now is a great time to take the first  steps in figuring out how to change these patterns, but when we think about it, we break out in a cold sweat and it seems overwhelming. One thing I have begun to do and that you might want to think about,  is to spend 10 minutes a day for the next week (surely you can find 10 quiet minutes to dedicate to this!) asking yourself questions about what makes you really stand out and what you do differently than others in your line of work. Think about what your clients, customers and supporters would respond if asked about you. (Better yet, ask them!) Jot down what comes to mind.  Enjoy a nice cup of tea while you’re doing this, if you are so inclined.  Don’t skip a day and keep on writing, using a stream of consciousness technique. By the end of the week you should have quite a bit of information and insight to start working with.  Then it’s time for a glass of wine, in my opinion!  My tea kettle is already on the stove and my apple-caramel latte tea is in the steeping ball, waiting for me to begin!  How about you?

Do you remember the first time you ever put on roller skates or ice skates and how gingerly you began moving? You were fearful, insecure, and as you watched the other, more proficient skaters, you decided you would never be able to match their amazing skill. You held on to the railing, or to your companions, but eventually, you took an awkward step, maybe you fell, took another step and kept on going.  After a while you actually began having fun.

Any task is doable and manageable,  if you do it incrementally, but you must get started.

I would be thrilled if you would consider sharing with me,. with us, the goals you have set, but now feel discouraged with.  We can try to come up with some ways to get back in action.  Let’s do it together! Let’s design the steps you can begin to take. Even a few tentative steps will get you moving.

I did it! There’s my blog post and I have a bunch more to begin working on–one sentence at time if need be, till they take shape.

Happy January 22nd!